“Minivan Cowboy”

Driving around your hometown
With my half baked plan & a guy named Dan
Just like a cowboy in a minivan
I’ve got my pod on top & I ain’t gonna stop
Till I get wherever it is I’m going
Don’t care if it’s raining, sleeting or snowing

I’ll be there in a coupla hours
To take a liquor shower
Caterwaul till dawn and the top of my lungs
Till the drinks are gone & my songs are sung
& if I desire if I get too drunk
I might expire and go sleep in my trunk

Yodeling in my dreams in the Walmart parking lot
Snoring till the morning light gleams
& all those those freaky deaky people come to shop
They rouse you awake with shock, like an alarm clock
but it’s better than getting woke up by the cops
Just like that morning over at the truck stop

Make my rounds strap it down
Attract some dirty looks and frowns
Try to choke some water down
before getting out of town
Wake up, Gas up, Breakfast sandwich with Ketchup
Fill up the cup with Coffee or coke
Zone out and have a morning toke

Yoda-layyyyyy-heeeeee

Staring at the bottom of an empty wallet
Plugging my phone into the whatchamacallit
Going through the day with my head in a cloud
The windows down the radios on
the navigator let’s out a great big yawn
and the music it plays loud
Seems like I got all I want and need
Good radio and a little bit of weed
And underneath me is my trusty steed

She’s a 2001 Toyota Sienna minivan named Goldie Hahn
She’s got a big crack going down the windshield and only one wiper
all the door handles are broke off
The gas tank’s ratchet strapped up to the bottom
The inspection is a year and half overdue
Weighed down by a 5 piece band
A drum set, a PA system, an upright bass, two guitar amps, a banjo, a fiddle, a guitar, a washboard, a mandolin and a dog!

In god and mechanic we trusted
Looks like some food on the dashboards crusted
Why is everything in this vehicle busted?

I’ve got a chronic bronchial cough
Gonna ride it till the wheels fall off
Getting high off the fumes we woft
& to toll booth workers I’m never rude
I’m trying not to eat too much fast food
To the road in front of me my eyes are glued
& in the summer I sleep in the nude

& I ain’t got any curtains
& when the sunshine starts shining through my sunburn starts hurting
& at the end of the day the people all say
hey! Who was that flasked, masked man anyway?
He was kind of a hairy fella
Playing in the band and driving the van
A stranger in an even stranger land
A stranger in an even stranger land
Driving off into the sunset in his minivan